I was recently taken aback when a same-sex couple asked me if they could join my HypnoBirthing childbirth education classes, i.e., would they be welcome? I was so shocked at having been asked this question that I sputtered, “Of course you’re welcome. All are welcome.” The question stuck with me for several days though. I kept finding myself pondering what would make this lovely woman ask a question that seemed so bizarre to me. Now, sadly, tragically, following the massacre in Orlando, I know the reason.
I don’t consider myself naive (probably nobody who’s naive considers themselves naive, I realize). Yet, this innocent question to me, and the shock that I felt upon learning the news about the Orlando shootings, made me realize that I live in an energetic bubble of my own making. Only people who have high-vibrating, loving energy are really allowed by me into my bubble—allowed close to me, allowed to interact with me. When I encounter people with low-vibrating, fearful energy, I’d rather go our separate ways for a while, until more awakening can occur.
I’ve been asked by some, “Are you one of those ‘loving, do-gooders’?” Yes, I can proudly say that I am a loving, do-gooder. (Perhaps out of my naiveté I think in response, “Is there anyone who wouldn’t want to be described as a loving, do-gooder?”) But my love is not the type of woo-woo mysticism that those people are dismissing—although I also have plenty of that woo-woo mysticism in my being as well. I’m also a warrior of love, which is much, much more difficult than the condescending question above recognizes.
Because, if I believe—I mean, truly believe—that all human beings are worthy of love, then I need to find a way in my heart to love those who hurt, injure, or belittle others. And that’s a very tough thing to do. To be honest, right now, I’m finding it very difficult to find love in my heart for the Orlando shooter. In order to find my way to some sort of love for him, and people like him, I need to process my rage—physical, kinesthetic rage—at his hatred, at his easy access to a weapon that nobody needs (despite him being on a “watch list” of suspected terrorists), at his choice to kill and injure innocents. Because we’re meant to feel, experience, and process our rage (and all of our emotions) as a means to transform and transmute that emotion into love; we’re just not meant to project our rage (or any of our other emotions) on others. That’s the hard part.
I’m sure that when I finish processing my rage, underneath that will be a layer of grief and despair—waves of tears that this type of hatred can even exist in this world. Sadness and disbelief that such “lack of love” even has a place here. As I type this, I can even feel that the next layer of processing is likely to be anger again—this time at myself; anger that, in the past, I could sit by, shaking my head and feeling sad, without speaking out. Perhaps after layers and layers of emotional processing, I will eventually come to the place where I can feel love in my heart for that man, as a human being. Let me be clear, I will never love his actions; that is impossible and would be unconscionable. But perhaps I can stumble my way towards love for his confused, tortured soul. Perhaps. I’m trusting that I can eventually get to that point. But if and when I get to that point, I can guarantee you that it will be because of intense emotional processing, and not because of some new-age, mystical, woo-woo, “let’s all love each other” naiveté.
What I know to be true is that we are all meant to love—just plain love—one another: beyond gender, beyond race, beyond nationality, beyond religion, beyond all characteristics that are used to (seemingly) divide us. We are just meant to love all others. Full stop. And that’s a hard thing to do; that’s not new-age mysticism. So, it’s time for me to get out of my bubble and be the warrior of love that I am. Please join me. Process your emotions around this and other incidents. Take action and speak out against hatred in the world. Take courageous stances on emotional hot-button issues like gun control. Always ask yourself, “Which path leads to more love?” Be a warrior of love. The world needs more of us.
(This is a posting that I placed on my Well Awakened Living blog: http://www.wellawakenedliving.com/blog/. I am cross-posting it here, so that all know they are welcome in my classes.)